Friday, February 16, 2007

Just Venting

WARNING: If you don't want to listen to me vent you'd better not look :o)

OK, so I'm just going to have a little rant & rave to myself to get the hollow feeling out of my stomach.

Yesterday Steve (Taigy's Dad) sent me an email accusing me of abusing my power as Taiga's guardian & filling her head with lies by letting her call Wayne Daddy & allowing her to go by our family name of Slattery & not the name on her birth certificate - which is in fact my maiden name.

So he's decided that its in Taiga's best interests for him to file for interim custody i.e. she should go & live with him.

Now, I'm not one to talk negatively about others - but I am willing to make an exception in this case.

What an absolute friggen fruitloop.

He has been to Taigy school & caused a fuss over her being enrolled under the name of Slattery....fair enough you may say, what's the fuss Kelly, after all its not her birth name....but my friend, here is the point:

I have been married to Wayne since Taiga was 17 months old - she has never known anyone else as a full-time Dad..so in her precious little mind her Dad is a Slattery, her Mum is a Slattery & her little bro is a Slattery - so why can't she be a Slattery???

What pisses me off is that Steve is just doing this out of pettiness & jealousy - I mean, its been 5 years man, GET OVER IT!!! Seriously - it HAS been 5 years - he was kicked out when she was still a newborn.

I'm not sure what he's trying to do, but he gave the school the impression that it was his last name on the birth certificate & they thought that's why he had a problem with the name - ah no - he's just an insecure freak who hasn't had a relationship in 5 years cos he hasn't got over it!!

I went up to the school today to give them a heads-up about how the situation has escalated (from him wanting her name to be MY maiden name) to now that he wants custody.

Anyway the teacher that I spoke to was raving on about how lovely Taiga is & what a lovely nature she has etc & said something to the effect of it coming from the both of us...so there again he has given the impression that he has been an influence in her life....WELL REALITY CHECK - I kicked his sorry ass to the curb when she was EIGHT (8) WEEKS OLD & she has NEVER spent more than a week at any given time with him - so I will take FULL credit along with Wayne for her being the precious little girl that she is today thank you very much !!!

Actually, now that I think of it, one of the teachers asked me if it was a recent marriage & that's why he has a problem with her name - ahhhh no, Wayne & I have been married nearly 4 years...and the thing that sucks the most is that I was only with steve for ONE year - what a bloody price to pay!!!

Even crazier is that he has 2 daughters from when he was 18/19 who he doesn't see & has never had anything to do with - these girls get passed off as a youthful error - yeah, whatever.

His justification for not seeing them "they already have a dad as their mum was married at the time & they had a stable relationship" ahhhhh yeah - then why was she screwing you mate???

He's such a tosser, he's playing the poor steve card as if we broke up yesterday...what is up with that????

Anyway - he says to me in his last email "I am confident that you will lose custody of Taiga"...I mean how delusional can a person get???? He honestly thinks that a court of law is going to take Taiga out of a happy, safe, secure family environment & hand her over to a single male with no support network based on the fact that she calls Wayne Daddy & goes by MY last name.

What a friggen waste of money, effort & energy...honestly if there is a lawyer in NZ who takes this case he/she has either got to be a straight out thief, or steve is seriously pulling his/her chain - which may be the case - I think the school fell for it & until they heard the other side of the story were quite willing to listen to his demands.

OK I probably haven't finished my rant but Ravey-boo has dragged food from the fridge along with a spoon - so he seriously wants to be fed LOL!!

17 comments:

Hannah said...

OH Kelly, what a huge headache for you!! I don't really have any advice (which is lucky, since you weren't really asking for it, anyway, LOL) but from what you've written it sounds like Steve doesn't really have a leg to stand on and he knows it. That is one good thing, but I guess the real pain is you are still going to have to deal with the courts and stuff before it all goes away, right? In that case, I hope you get it all sorted really quickly, and better yet that he stops being so delusional and just drops the whole thing.
((HUGS)), I'll be thinking of you. Hope things settle down and it all becomes a distant memory for you & Taigy.

~Zeetra~ said...

Hi Kelly, Zeetra here from the Scrapbook Outlet....
Sorry to hear that Taigas biological sperm donor is a complete loser...
Its a shame he has no life.. he is only going to wreck poor Taigas life if he keeps mucking around like that...
Sorry he seems like such a twit. I could use stronger words but I had better not-lol

Good Luck with everything.Thinking of you..

MichelleTW said...

Just a few words of encouragement really. YOU GO GIRL and go wayne too!! and give the school a kick up the butt!! What the hell???

Janine said...

Hey Kel

Man what a lot of crap to deal with. As you said he is insecure and trying to play hard ball. Stupid thing is he is going to losse his daughter one way or another by this silly attitude. It's pretty crappy that this is happening and he feels he should be stirring things up. Kia Kaha Kelly and Wayne.

Delys said...

Hey Kelly sorry you are getting crap from this loser but you have it right..theres no way that he would get anywhere near getting custody of Taigy. It sounds as though he is a bit of a charmer (read bulshitter)with his talking though. You are spot on letting the school know about whats going on. Big hugs from me and you GO girl!

Heidi said...

OH Kelly - BIG HUGS ALL THE WAY - for you & Taigy, he is such a loser, and doesn't realise that his selfishness is causing his daughter pain and confusion. I'm here for you buddy - a shoulder to lean on, STICK TO YOUR GUNS and get it sorted now once and for all,.... BIG HUGS and WAYNE is BRILLIANT father to Taiga, it is - Just because he is not the biological father doesn't make him any less of a father to her, it's not always that that counts, he has been there for her when she was sick, and her birthdays, christmas, and gave her a wonderful place to call home and have some roots, not to mention her gorgeous little Brother - RAVEN who adores his little "TAIGA" - I'm backing you all the way girl.

Andrea B said...

Chin up girl! Wayne and yourself have done a wonderful job, just look how happy that wee girl is. Someone needs a reality check.

Mrs Frizz said...

Thinking of you Kell ... hang in there.

tanyaleigh said...

Kelly I know how you feel. It isn't easy bringing 2 families together as one. We have been through what you are and it isn't easy but be sure that there is NO way he will be able to take Taigy from you. Tell the school that the only person to pick up Taigy is you and no one else without you knowing. The sort of things he is doing isn't going to help with his relationship with his daughter. Neil's 15 year old son is moving in with us when he is 16 due to his mother....He sounds like a major loser and he needs to get a life. Thinking of you Kelly.

Julie said...

Hey Kelly - how you feeling today? I don't envy you one bit! Gosh its sooo frustrating how these things from the past have a nasty habit of disrupting our lives! Been there with the ex who thinks he is God crap and it wasn't fun! Ash's bio dad is a muso living in Aussie now - but he was a disruptive force for several years then he stopped until Ash was 13 then wanted to be a "Daddy" again - he was so angry with me for legally changing Ash's surname from my maiden name to Bode when I got married. We kept Ash right out of it - I let her make her own mind up - she decided he was a world class jerk when he told her I was a bit "loose" and he wasn't sure if he was her bio dad - we have the DNA test to prove he is!
Some males bring utmost shame on the good men who take on their kids. Steve will do all the damage all by himself, you are so right in your feelings - Taigy has a great family life - let him make a dick of himself - you can quietly go behind him and repair surface damage. You go girl - we will always win - they are just to stupid to know it!

Julie said...

P.S - our case was settled in a family court judges chambers - 1 meeting just Leo and I - Seven "couldnt" make it - it was so thrown out - Judges take offence to having their time wasted - so like I said let him do all the dirty work - you just carry on living your happy family life.

Ali said...

Oh Kel,
Thinking of you chooky!
He is just being a pain in the butt and you know he has no legs to stand on in this matter.
You and Wayne are great parents and that will shine through. I hope for your sake and Taigas that he is just bluffing and will not go through with any of this nonsense...to save you all some stress!!!
Chin up and here if you need a chat!
Ali x x x

Julie said...

What a crap thing to have to deal with Kel - vent away all you want chicky, hopefully it helps clear the mind/heart a bit. I hope too that the loser becomes distracted by something else to whine about and drops/forgets about this matter.
Chin up Kel, you are a strong, loving person with a loving/supportive family and you will overcome this.
take care

Kelly said...

Oh Yikes Kelly. This stuff is just crappy. My BIL had a mental ex-wife who pulled all kinds of stunts. She was a charmer and somehow (GOD only knows!) was the one that seemed to dictate all the crap even to this day. It was scary to watch. I think the BIG difference is the stable environment you guys have - Keep your cool with teh "powers that be" but I reckon he hasn't got a leg to stand on. Good luck and loads of positive vibes being sent your way. Take care.

Beverley said...

Hey Kelly, what'ya up to? Are you still having problems? I've noticed you haven't been around as much lately - hope you're holding up o.k. Thinking of you.

Kelly said...

Hey Kelly - Just popped in to see how things were going. Hope they've improved a bit. Take care.

~Zeetra~ said...

Hi Kelly, I too have popped in to see how you are...

Hope all is good in the Slattery house tonight...

Thinking of you all.

Zeetra